Cartman Changes
by eBayaNgel2000
Summary: After performing a stupid stunt, Cartman's personality changes and he goes from a manipulative fatboy to an empathetic fatboy. He doesn't make fun of Kyle anymore, he doesn't demand his mother to do things for him and he repects teachers. Will it last?
1. Cartman goes to the ER and then

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters

Chapter One: Cartman goes to the ER and then...

"Hey guys," said Cartman. "Did you see Jackass Number Two?"

"No," said Kyle. "I saw the firehose rodeo, but my mom made me turn it off..."

"I saw all of it," muffled Kenny.

"High five!"

"So did I," said Stan. "But my mom says I shouldn't be watching that crap."

"Dude, I'm gonna try the fire hose rodeo," said Cartman. "I got a cup and loads of protection."

"I'm telling you Cartman, you're gonna get hurt," said Stan.

"Do you think I give a damn?" said Cartman as he climbed on the fire hose.

Then he turned on the fire hose and started riding. Then it went awry and he fell off.

"Cool! Cartman fell off! Serves him right!" said Kyle.

"Shut your damn mouth, Kyle," snapped Stan. "I think he got knocked out."

"I'm gonna call 911," mumbled Kenny. Then he dialed 911.

"911? What's your emergency?"

"I have a friend who fell off a fire hose," mumbled Kenny.

"Sir, please speak a little louder. We can't hear you," said the lady over the phone.

"Goddammit, my friend is hurt!" Then Kenny, frustrated, hung up.

"We're gonna have to rush him to the ER," said Stan. "But we have to ask his mom to drive us. Ms.Cartman?"

"Yes, Stanley?" said Liane Cartman.

"Eric got hurt," said Stan. "We need to rush him to the ER."

So they got into the van, while about most of the time, she was crying and Stan had to drive for since Kyle was being a total ass.

So 2 hours later, Cartman got a room at Hells Pass Hospital. He was still alive.

"Eric? Are you OK, poopsykins?" He finally woke up.

"Yes, mother. I am." Cartman was smiling.

"Your friends are here. Stanley was especially worried about you. Kenny was too."

"We brought you some Cheese Poofs, Cartman," mumbled Kenny.

"Thank you, Kenneth," said Cartman.

"Sure thing," said Kenny.

"Is there anything else you want, Cartman?"

"No thank you, Stanley."

"Can you hold on one minute, Cartman?"

"Of course."

Then Kenny walked with Stan outside the door.

"Dude, something about Cartman isn't right."

"I know."

"I mean, he's being nicer to me and you. Kyle's not even paying respect to him. I mean, Cartman's calling me Stanley and you're being called Kenneth. I guess we're going to have to get used to him being a whole lot nicer to everyone."

"I think your son is ready to go back home Mrs. Cartman," said the doctor. "He can go to school tomorrow."

So will Cartman's empathetic side last... or will he be mean to Kyle like he used to be?

TBC 


	2. The New Cartman and Kyle Changes too

Chapter Two: The New Cartman and Kyle changes too...

"I'm telling you, Kyle, he's changed," said Stan over the phone.

"Oh yeah?" said Kyle snobbishly.

"He didn't call Kenny a welfare freak," said Stan.

"Yeah right, you big pussy," snapped Kyle.

"And Cartman didn't call me that," said Stan.

"Did he call me a stupid Jew?"

"No."

"I don't believe you. You're taking the fat-boy's side now," snapped Kyle.

"He's not fat, he's big-boned," said Stan. Then he hung up without saying anymore. He kind of liked Cartman more now that he was nicer.

"Mom, do I have to go to school tomorrow?" said Kyle while watching The Terrence and Phillip Show.

"Yes, Kyle," said Sheila Broflovski.

"But mom, I don't wanna go!"

"You have to otherwise no dessert for 3 weeks unless you have a good reason!"

"BUT MOM I DON'T WANNA GO TO SCHOOL TOMORROW BECAUSE I DON'T FEEL WELL!!"

"OK, I guess I'll call in for you as sick!"

Kyle smiled. I think that he's becoming more like the old Cartman and becoming manipulative and self-centered.

"OK, class," said Mrs. Garrison. "What is the square root of 25?"

"Mrs. Garrison, the square root of 25 is 5," said Cartman while placing an apple on her desk.

"By God, Eric you're right!" exclaimed Mrs. Garrison. "And just for that, you don't have any homework tonight!"

"Lucky duck!" said Powder.

"More power to you!" said Token.

"Cartman! Cartman!" said Stan, then the whole class joined in, including Mrs. Garrison.

"I made some cookies for you, Janet," said Cartman, smiling. This was the first time that not only he ever made cookies for a teacher, but called them by their first name politely.

"These are delicious, Eric, you don't have homework for the rest of the week!"

Then at lunch, Cartman shared his lunch with everybody. He never did that, plus he was being nice to every person, including the Goth Kids.

Kyle was having a ball feigning illness so he didn't have to see Cartman, who he now called a bastard for no reason. He called everyone, including Stan a bastard.

So as everyone was riding the bus home, everyone wanted to sit next to him. So he said that maybe each day he would sit next to a different person, but today it was Kenny and Stan.

"Stanley, can you give this to Kyle?" asked Cartman. He had some chocolate and cookies he made all by himself. "Too bad he couldn't come to school today. Also when you see him, tell him I said hi."

So they all said bye to each other and Stan went over to Kyle's and rang the doorbell.

"Hello, Stanley," said Sheila.

"Hi, is Kyle home?"

"Sure, come in."

"Hello, bastard."

"Hey Kyle. Cartman said hi and he wanted me to bring you some cookies he made."

Kyle snatched them along with the chocolate and then snapped at Stan "Get the hell out of my house or I'll rip your goddamn balls off!!!"

Then Stan ran away.

So.. do you think Kyle will stay mean to everybody or will he change?

TBC... 


	3. Kyle Pays a A Visit to Mr Mackey

Chapter Three: Kyle pays a visit to Mr. Mackey

"Good to see you Kyle," said Token.

"Is that a new hat?" said Powder.

"Get out of the way!" snapped Kyle.

"OK, class," said Mrs. Garrison. "I want to know what is 100 times 3?"

"I think I know the answer, Mrs. Garrison," said Cartman sweetly.

"Me me me me me," mocked Kyle.

"Quit mocking me!" said Cartman vaguely.

"Don't tell me to stop you fat ass!" said Kyle.

"Kyle! Did you just call Eric the a word?" said Mrs. Garrison.

"Fat?"

"No he's talking about ass, you can't say ass in school," reminded Cartman sweetly.

"Shut up you asswipe!" snapped Kyle.

"Dude, you just called Eric an asswipe and you can't say that in school," said Stan.

"Eric and Stanley, just for for telling Kyle it was wrong, you get to chew gum in class from now on"  
said Mrs. Garrison. "As for you, Kyle, I am writing a note to Mr. Mackey you need to see him."

2 minutes later the letter said:

MR. MACKEY---

KYLE BROFLOVSKI NEEDS TO SEE YOU. NOW. HE HARASSED A STUDENT. YOUR CHOICE FOR CONSEQUENCES.

JANET GARRISON

Then he folded it up and said "Eric, can you take this to Mr. Mackey?"

"Yes sir." Then he did as told.

Then as it was SSR, the phone rang.

"Hello?"

"I'm ready to see Kyle now, mm'kay?" said Mr. Mackey.

"OK, I'll send him down. Bye."

Then Mrs. Garrison whispered in Kyle's ear he needed to go to the counselor.

"Hello, Kyle," said Mr. Mackey as Kyle entered. "Have a seat, mm'kay?"

"What do you need to talk to me about?" said Kyle.

"Well, your teacher tells me you harassed another student."

"I did not!"

"Why don't you tell me everything, mm'kay?"

"OK, when Cartman was going to answer a math problem, I kind of mocked him and he told me to stop.  
So I called him fat ass. Then he told me that I can't say ass in school. Then I called him an asswipe."

Mr. Mackey had a very shocked look on his face.

"You called Eric Cartman an fat ass and then an asswipe?" said Mr. Mackey. "Now, your friend was right to say that you can't say ass in school. If you do this again or something similar, you come straight back here and I call your mother and if you harass another kid, I'm sending you down here and not only calling your mother and their mother, but asking Mrs. Garrison to give you after-school detention, mm'kay?"

"Fine," sighed Kyle angrily. He left for recess.

"Hey Kyle," said Butters. "Word has it you got busted for calling Eric an asswipe.."

Kyle had lost it. He punched Butters in the eye. Then he pushed him into a wall and choked him.

"That's not true you bastard," scowled Kyle.

All the kids were shocked at Kyle. He never acted this was around anyone, except once in while his friends.

"I'm telling on you, Kyle," said Bebe Stevens (by the way, she's Stan's current girlfriend).

Kyle, then slapped Bebe.

"Dude, that's a girl. She's my girlfriend, you know," said Stan. Then Kyle punched Stan.

"What is going on here????" said Mrs. Garrison.

Everyone who wasn't beaten up pointed at Kyle. She saw Butters with blood and a black eye, Bebe with a mark and Stan with a bloody jaw.

Then, without anything else to say, she grabbed Kyle's hand and took him down to Mr. Mackey's.

"Hello, how may I help you today, Janet?" said Principal Victoria.

"Kyle Broflovski needs to see Mr. Mackey again."

"Oh. I'll get him." This was the first time, this year anybody needed to see Mr. Mackey twice in one day.

"KYLE AGAIN??? Mm'kay..." said Mr. Mackey. Then Kyle went in while Mrs. Garrison glared at him and escorted Bebe, Stan and Butters in.

"I can't believe you harassed someone twice in one day," said Mr. Mackey, glaring, which he never does.

"No," sighed Butters. "He didn't h-h-h-harass us."

"What'd he do?"

"He beat us all up," they replied at once.

"Tell your side of the story, starting with Butters, mm'kay?"

"Well, when I heard he got in trouble, I thought I'd let him know, then, for no reason, he punched me in eye and pushed me into a wall and choked me," said Butters.

"Mm'kay, Stanley?"

"No, maybe you should ask Bebe."

"Mm'kay, Bebe?"

"Well, then I felt sorry for Butters and then I told Kyle I was going to tell on him, then he slapped me."

"Then I stood up for Bebe then Kyle punched me."

"Kyle, I'm calling your parents, mm'kay? Children, please leave the room for just a moment, mm'kay?" They all left, then Mr. Mackey added, "Except Kyle." Then Kyle sat down angrily.

"Hello?" said Sheila over the phone.

"Yes, this is Mr. Mackey, school counselor," said Mr. Mackey.

"What can I do for you?"

"Your son, did two school offense in one day."

There was a long pause. Then Sheila broke the silence by saying "Excuse me???"

"The first offense was this morning when your son called a student named Eric Cartman fat, who happens to be friends with him."

"Oh my God."

"The second offense was he beat up a boy named Butters Scotch who is his friend, then a girl named Bebe Stevens and then his best friend Stanley Marsh."

"Oh my God," repeated Sheila.

"I may call you in this school but not today, Mrs. Broflovski, mm'kay?"

"Goodbye." She was really shocked.

"Kyle you may leave. Butters, come in."

"Am I in trouble?"

"Of course not, I need you to call your mother to tell her what happened. She may need to talk to Kyle's mother, mm'kay?"

So he did, he told his mother he wasn't in trouble. Then Bebe did the same as well as Stan.

So... will Kyle's friends and peers turn against him??? 


	4. Confronting Kyle and Sadness

Chapter Four: Confronting Kyle and Sadness

"Kyle," said Stan, still recovering. "We need to talk. Kenny wants to talk too."

"Whatever," snapped Kyle.

"Listen," said Stan, firmly. "We're not going to be friends if you keep beating up my peers and girlfriend. We can be friends, if you'll just calm down, OK?"

"You guys can just screw off, OK?" said Kyle.

"Well, screw you then," muffled Kenny angrily. Then they walked off.

"Oh my God," said Kyle. "what have I done? I'm turning out like the old me and Cartman! This is all my fault! I shouldn't have wished for that!"

"Wished for what?" said a familar voice. It was Chef. He was everyone's guardian angel.

"Chef? You're dead!"

"I'm actually a guardian angel. I heard about the fight. Don't cover it up. Why did you wish for Cartman to be hurt???" said Chef, kindly but firmly.

"He was making fun of me for being a Jew and I got sick of it so then I wished for him to fall off a hose," replied Kyle.

"That wasn't very nice," said Chef. "None of your friends will forgive you."

"I know," said Kyle, looking like he was going to cry."I miss the old Cartman. He's way too nice now. I mean, I like the fact he's supernice to everyone, including me but it just created me into a monster. But I miss it when he's mean and disrespectful to teachers, I just miss it. I mean I really used to hate it, but I've realized, he was funny. How can I--"

"Hold it right there," interrupted Chef. "You miss the old Cartman? Maybe you should see your friends' point of view..."

Then Chef showed a visual of Stan and Kenny.

(in visual)...

"Damn, I miss the old Cartman. He's supernice and all, but I miss it when he goes "na na na na na na,  
heh heh heh heh heh." It's so funny," said Stan.

"Me too," muffled Kenny.

(end of visual)

"See?" said Chef. "Your friends feel the same way... everybody pretty much does. They like it that he's nice, but he's gone overboard with the friendliness. Maybe we should see your friend Cartman's point view on this."

(in visual)

original

"wow, mother, I'm more popular now that I'm nice to everyone."

currently

"Damn, now that I'm nice to everyone, I can't cuss or do anything fun anymore. I miss the old me."

(end of visual)

"See?" said Chef. "Now that your friend is nice to everyone, it's making some people miserable and even himself miserable. See what I mean? We need to get him back to his old ways."

"But how?" said Kyle.

"What does he hate the most?"

"Hippies!" blurted Kyle.

"That's it! We have to bring a bunch of hippies to his house and then he'll be his oldself again!"

"Doesn't that seem a little... cruel?"

"You're the cruel one, Kyle," reminded Chef. "Now we need to round up some hippies."

So... will Cartman convert to his old self with hippies because of his hate for them? 


	5. Hippies and the Old Cartman Returns

Chapter Five: Hippies and Old Cartman

Even though Chef was a ghost, he managed to round up some hippies thanks to their ghost seeing abilities.

DING DONG!

"Just a minute," said Cartman.

"Hello Cartman," said Kyle.

"Kyle."

"I have a surprise for you," said Kyle.

Then he took Cartman to his backyard and much to his chagrin, saw a bunch of hippies.

"Hey man," said one.

"Aughh!! Hippies!!!" Cartman was angry. He beat up all the hippies.While he was distracted, fairy dust sprinkled on him and he was mean again.

"Kyle, thank you for bringing back the old me," said Cartman.

"Anything for a friend," said Kyle.

So... I guess Cartman went back to normal. No more sharing lunch, no more baking cookies all by himself, no more being nice to everyone, no more kissing up to teachers and no more respecting adults. 


End file.
